Today, I welcome a very special guest to talk with me about hostess gifts. My Mom exemplified graciousness in her life and I am so thankful for her example. As we approach the holiday season, remember that even the simplest gifts can create the most meaningful memories. A homemade pound cake, a bouquet of flowers, or fresh vegetables from the garden can bring comfort, happiness and encouragement. In my second podcast episode (audio and transcript below), I share about hostess gift etiquette and offer a link where you can submit your own questions for me to answer.
The Tradition of Giving a Host Gift
Since we are approaching the holiday season, I thought it would be appropriate to talk about the importance of taking a host gift to the hostess.
I’ve decided the best person to have on my podcast this evening is my dear mom, Pat Burton. She is the one who instilled in me never to go to anyone’s home for dinner without a gift. It could be a jar of jelly; it could be a homemade cake. It could be something that you made, or a special candle, but always arrive at the guest home with a gift. And let me say, I have been doing a lot of reading about this in places around the world.
Thoughtfulness Matters When Choosing a Gift
In America, we think a host gift is only a bottle of wine or chocolate, but the proper thing to do is to research the person’s home that you’re going into. For example, if they’re not drinkers, you might not want to take a bottle of wine. If they’re diabetics, you might not want to take chocolate. So, it’s important to know who you’re taking the gift to, and the gift should reflect some thoughtfulness. Some thinking and thoughtfulness into the person that’s working so hard to entertain you.
So today, I will interview my mom. Welcome, Pat Burton. I would like for you to tell me things that you and my Daddy would take to people, to neighbors, such as cakes or items from the garden. Please share about events, visiting, church and the kinds of things that you would take for host gifts when you would visit people.
I always carried a gift when I went into a home for dinner, or for other things. If they were having a problem and I could make them feel better, when we would go to places like a home for dinner, I would always go and buy some flowers and I would let my husband carry those flowers to the lady of the home.
It seemed that it worked better that way and thrilled the lady to think that a man would bring her flowers. And that worked well with my husband and I, but I went and bought the flowers. But anyway, I just always carried a gift.
Now, Mama, would you talk a little bit about Daddy and his farming and garden, and how he would take vegetables from his garden (such as tomatoes and corn) and box them up, and the joy that that would bring to people? We also had chickens and eggs. So, would you talk about that a little bit?
We would carry things like that from the house or his garden, to people that were sick or needy. We would take some to our pastor to help them out, and to make them feel good.
And what about the neighbors? Did Daddy take tomatoes and corn to the neighbors?
Yes, yes, he would.
The Power of the Pound Cake
And I would like for you to elaborate a little bit on the joy and happiness that it would bring to people that you and Daddy ministered to…those that might be sick or going through struggles in life. Can you talk a little bit about the power of the pound cake? That will be my next blog post, on the power of the pound cake. Because I believe you have a very special pound cake that was most recently published in a cookbook in Peachtree City, Georgia.
Yes, I won the first prize. I named it the Legacy Cookbook, and I won the first prize for that, and it was a recipe that I made up myself. And I’ve been making that cake for years and years, and my grandchildren would come down here and just love it. I would just let them cut it themselves, whether their hands were dirty or not. I just let them feel at home to do it.
And I would carry that cake to others when they were sick or when there was a death in the family…just something to make them feel a little better.
So, can you tell me what ingredients go in your special pound cake?
I will try.
That’s okay. We’ll keep that a secret. You’ll have to call Pat later or buy the Legacy Cookbook from Peachtree City Baptist Church, to get those ingredients. All family members have that, and it’s very special.
So, I just would like to elaborate on the power of the pound cake. Let me say, Mom, I don’t know if you remember this, but when I was in high school, you sliced a piece of cake for every one of my teachers. And I would meet and greet them on Monday morning, with a fresh piece of pound cake. That’s because the baking was done on Sunday afternoon. I believe I was one of the favorites in my high school, because they were always greeted on Monday morning with a slice of pound cake. The power of the pound cake. Do you have any more stories to tell about the pound cake and my Dad?
Yes, that was his favorite cake. He did not like cake with icing on it. Sometimes, after we moved from Cartersville down here, and I had all the children live next to me, I would have to bake two a week. That pound cake is special because I made that recipe up myself.
Okay, thank you, Mama, so much for your help in making this podcast a success.
A Holiday Season Reminder: Give from the Heart
But let me say to all my listeners that I hope that you get the message from this – whether it’s pound cake, jam, jelly or flowers, always remember to show up with a gift. It says, “I care” and I recognize your need or the dinner that you are working so hard to provide. People do not forget that. They do not forget those who show up with a gift or a treasure from the heart.
It can be something that you make as well. For my Dad, it was the crops. It was tomatoes, and we had a pear tree and we had pecans in our yard, and oftentimes, he would take a sack of pecans.
So don’t forget, when you’re meeting and greeting this holiday season, take a gift. Most important of all, bring joy from your heart and a smile to those friends and family that you love so much. It will be remembered, and let’s remember this podcast as the power of the pound cake. See you soon!
Practice Gratitude and Proper Etiquette This Holiday Season with a Thoughtful Hostess Gift
Etiquette Expert, Lisa Burdette, offers private and group classes for children and families as well as business etiquette training for professionals. Lisa’s experiences training in London and Paris as well as working with businesses, country clubs etc (such as Hotel Drover, The University of Texas at Dallas, Toyota Corporation and others) have helped her become a sought-after etiquette consultant in the areas of hospitality, dining, social skills and more.
Don’t forget to leave your question regarding etiquette and manners for Lisa at https://etiquettedallas.com/podcast-question/. It may be featured on a future episode!
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